Posted by Rampant Coyote on June 3, 2013
Sometimes I think I’ve been wrecked for life. When I was younger – especially in my high school and college years – I would sometimes be up most or all the night playing games. Hours would go by barely noticed as I’d be absorbed in some game. Then I’d feel guilty when I finally quit and realized how much time I’d put into a game -usually because I was supposed to be doing something else. After all, I was always supposed to be doing something else… studying, cleaning up the house, whatever.
It’s been years, and in spite of being an unapologetic gamer, I still have to fight that guilt sometimes.
In recent years, I would sometimes worry that the simply joy I used to experience of being completely absorbed by a game for hours at a time – even a “dumb” arcade-style shooter – was something that wasn’t possible anymore.I’d play top console games – the kind that I believe that, as a kid, I would have played obsessively for hours on end. And they just aren’t thrilling me. Maybe it was because I was now a jaded ol’ game developer. I have a tough time playing a game without a critical, analytical eye. Sometimes I wonder if my experience makes that old joy just something I can only experience through memory and nostalgia.
Has anybody else ever felt that way? The games of today just not doing it for you anymore? And you wonder, “Is it them, or is something wrong with me?” Are those years of latent guilt poisoning the well? If anybody suggested I’d “outgrown” games I’d probably feel inclined to punch them. No way – I still loved games, I still appreciated them, I just had doubts as to whether or not I could be as completely absorbed by a game as I once was.
Fortunately, over the last couple of years, I have found I don’t really have to worry about that anymore. I keep discovering that I’m still as much a sucker for a good game as I ever was. It really was them, not me. And once again I have to fight feelings of guilt as I realize my quick twenty-minute trial turned into three whole hours. Ah, well.
I find it’s pretty evenly split between indie games and mainstream games (although some of the mainstream games are older titles I took a while to get around to). I think it’s just a combination of quality and my own changing tastes. I’m just glad to know I’m not as jaded as I once feared.
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