103 Reasons Indie Games Rock! (April Fools Contest)

Posted by Rampant Coyote on April 2, 2010

The April Fools Contest worked out great – so great, I may consider making some kind of contest an annual event.  (It’s secretly a birthday event, actually, but don’t tell anybody…)

Without further ado (we’ll leave all the doo at the end) – here are…

103 Reasons Indie Games Rock!

1. “Because even famous archeologists are Indie!”  (And their dogs, too)
2. Are you “indie” game?  Cause we are!
3. Price is small, play is big.  It’s better than the other way around
4. Where micro-transactions mean you buy many games, not many parts of one.
5. Independent Studios, Independent games, independent ideas, not dependent on mass produced sequels.  How can this go wrong?
6. Indie means we spend more on the game and less on the marketing.  How does that strike you?
7. Indie’s gaming laws:  The amount of freedom in a game is inversely proportional to the amount of money spent marketing it.
8. Indie Spendence day:  The day you splurge and buy those indie games you’ve wanted.

—- G Kemble

9. Why do indie games rock?  Hey: INDIE DON’T NEED NO REASON TO ROCK.

— Cameron Goble

10. I spent most of my game money on booze and only have $10 this month.
11. My attention span, unlike my girlfriend, only enjoys things that can be finished in under 10 minutes.
12. 2D is the new 3D.
13. I am too lazy to drive to the store to purchase AAA games.
14. My laptop can run flash better than directx10.
15. My server has a terminal but not a graphics card.
16. They have cured my fear of caves.
17. I am a professional parkour athlete and I only enjoy platformers.
18. They are made out of the souls of melted down guitars.
19. I am getting too old for real-time.
20. I am an asshole and like to steal games via torrents and indie game makers and publishers do not have the resources to sue me. (Uh, oh, that one oughta disqualify you! *g* — Jay)
21. Ninja Pirate Robot Zombie Unicorns never get old.
22. Hipsters are slightly less soulless than corporations.
23. We got to the moon on 8-bit.
24. Gouraud shading.

— devon

25. ‘Because you can feel the love.’ (Yes, it is meant to be just a tad creepy.)
— Aelfric

26. Nudity doesn’t need censoring, it’s already pixelated!
27. Not affected by piracy, the torrent file is bigger than the game file. (If only the first part were true… — Jay)
28. If the game sucks you can hate a real person and not a company.
— wolfing

29. Even when they suck, they suck in unique and interesting ways mainstream games couldn’t dream of.
30. The developers can argue with fans without getting Marketing upset.
31. Indie RPGs aren’t contractually obliged to include the Towers of Hanoi.
32. They give ordinary people hope that they can release an actual game that sells and has fans.
33. Weird games about obscure topics rule.
34. They can still rip off that old game you like that history forgot.
35. When you give the devs your email address, they probably won’t spam the hell out of it. (Muhahahahah! — Jay)

— user@example.com

36. Indie games are developed by people who love games, not by soulless multinational corporations.

— Cowgod

37. They’re created to be actually fun instead of to maximize a corporation’s return on investment.
38. Indie developers pour their heart and soul into the game instead of simply collecting a paycheck. (Whaddaya mean ‘simply’? You mean some of us DO collect paychecks? — Jay)
39. I can find something completely innovative, comfortingly familiar, and shockingly fun all in one convenient game.
40. I don’t have to listen to months (and months and months) of mainstream hype (and, sometimes, outright lies) before the game comes out.
41. I can support the little guy’s ramen budget directly instead of lining the pockets of a giant, faceless publisher.
42. The voices in my head are less violent when I’m playing indie games than when playing mainstream games with realistic blood splatters.
43. I can enjoy convenient downloads instead of buying a single-player game that requires me to be connected to the internet all the time to make sure I’m not a dirty pirate.
44. If I want to play games on the cheap, saving the world in an indie RPG is better than taking care of a virtual farm on a social network.
45. I can vote with my dollars and support games I like instead of being forced to only buy games that are marketed to me.
46. I can look cool to my friends by recommending some obscure game they’ve never heard of.  Well, it works like that for music, why not games?
47. The games are designed by a small team of passionate developers, not thought up by a egotistical CEO then have any traces of fun designed out by committee.
48. Indie developers are too busy to withhold some of the content as DLC available at launch that requires an additional purchase; they make real sequels if the game does well.
49. The game was built first and foremost to be a fun game, not part of a giant franchise including movies, TV shows, dog sweaters, and lunchboxes.
50. Successful indie developers are happy to give back to the community and share with others instead of simply squeezing more and more money out of gamers.
51. Indie games focus on fun and interesting mechanics instead of using the latest graphical tricks to make the screenshots look good.

— Psychochild

52. Indie games ROCK because crossing the line is a good thing
53. Indie games ROCK because a $15 box of brain breaking platforming is better than a $60 FPS
54. Indie games ROCK because ASCII graphics are still cool
55. Indie games ROCK because crazy people make better games
56. Indie games ROCK because I’m cheap
57. Indie games ROCK because SOME money might go to the developer (instead of the publisher)
58. Indie games ROCK because risky ideas might be more fun
59. Indie games ROCK because a safety net is a joke
60. Indie games ROCK because commercial developers aren’t bastards enough
61. Indie games ROCK because Chuck Norris said so
62. Indie games ROCK because Linus Torvalds said so
63. Indie games ROCK because manipulating the flow of time is actually cooler than portal technology
64. Indie games ROCK because command lines are FUN
65. Indie games ROCK because Linux builds are epic
66. Indie games ROCK because I now hit shift in any platformer when I make a bad jump
67. Indie games ROCK because my mind is now broken in the fourth dimension

— HiddenSpartan

68. You can feel the code eating your keyboard
69. You can feel the love eating your keyboard
70. Duke Nukem Forever would have been done in 48 hours
71. When you want to kill a terrorist, you play triple A, when you want to understand the quantum mechanics, you play Indie.
72. Sometimes there’s even a last level
73. They’re always free except when they’re 10 dollars (Or 15, or 20, or 24.99, or… — Jay)
74. When else do you get the chance to finish the developers’ code?
75. All they require to make is one person without friends
76. All that test code and prototypes you did at school are full working games!
77. The devs do anything just to get you to buy their games. Humiliation is always entertaining.
78. tHis sentnc4 is just aSAs pol*ishe-d:
79. Made for fun, not for money
80. If it’s not controversial, it’s AAA.
81. There’s no studio to layoff workers.
82. It’s the new Dungeons & Dragons.
83. Too much HDR burns your eyes
84. Development blogs work like sing-along songs
85. Developers don’t like driving Ferraris
86. 2 squares and one colour is life changing

— Stringycustard

87. NO DRM.
88. Innovate on existing gameplay mechanics.
89. NO STINKING DRM.
90. Spends more time on polishing gameplay than polishing graphics.
91. NO OBNOXIOUS DRM.
92. Usually cross platform; game is on both Windows and Mac, and sometimes Linux.
93. NEED NOT BE CONSTANTLY ONLINE TO PLAY SINGLE PLAYER GAMES.
94. Able to pester the developer directly for an OSX version after making the switch to Mac. (translated: done it before!) (D’oh! — Jay)
95. NO DRM AS THERE’S NOT MANY CROSS-PLATFORM DRM TECHNOLOGY OUT THERE.
96. Costs much less than popular titles.
97. DRM COSTS NOT PASSED ON TO PAYING CUSTOMERS.
98. Able to converse directly with developers, not some PR person, via official forums or blog.
99. PAYING CUSTOMERS GET BETTER VALUE THAN PIRATES.
100. Usually low on system resources, doesn’t require a top-of-the-line PC. Playable while alt-tabbing out to other apps
101. I CAN PLAY ON MY WORKSTATION WITHOUT INFECTING IT WITH STINKING DRM.
102. Feels like I’m contributing to the health of PC gaming when I purchase an indie game.
103. DOESN’T FEEL LIKE I’M SUPPORTING INVASIVE TECHNOLOGY.

— Muhammad

And now for the contest part of things.

In all honesty, I didn’t expect it to be so hard. There were a lot of good ones – some that made me wince and say, “Yeah, kinda true,” a lot that made me laugh, and a whole bunch that made me pump my fist in the air and say, “Damn straight!”

You guys rock.

I ended up not trusting my judgment and went to several friends and associates with a list of my favorites, and asked them to pick their top three. That was little help, as they all chose different answers.  I was about to resort to random dice-rolling, but eventually I had a few responses that garnered two votes. And finally two of them garnered three votes – but both were from Devon. I stopped while I was ahead:

“Ninja Pirate Robot Zombie Unicorns never get old.” and

“We got to the moon on 8-bit.”

Devon, to prevent you from becoming an asshole who steals from torrents (#20), you can pick any game from RampantGames.com and I’ll pick up the bill for ya! I’ll email you with details. Take some time to play some demos and decide!

Because we had a lot of entries from the same people, and to encourage participation in the future, and especially to weasel out of having to pick runners-up from such a great list, I’m going to go ahead and make ALL PARTICIPANTS runners-up and give everybody who participated in the contest a free license for Void War.  Just ‘cuz I can – and so there’ll be other people around with the game with whom you can maybe play multiplayer with. 🙂  Expect an email from me over the weekend.

The contest is over, but that shouldn’t stop anyone. What are YOUR reasons why indie games rock? Or what are your favorites from the list? Let’s add 103 more reasons!

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